What to say at a stoplight while next to someone in your car:
1. "Excuse me, do you have any Grey Poupon?"
2. "Pardon me, but your music is disturbing my snorkel gear!"
3. "Excuse me, but if I take the next exit, how far do I drive until I get to Texas?"
4. "Dude, that car is, like, totally rippin'!" (then by extending your pinky and thumb, and twisting your hand back and forth, that is the sign to "hang loose" or in Hawaiian, it's called "Shaka"...it's the cool thing to do, dude!)
Things to say to a waiter/waitress in a resaurant:
1. "Hey, babe/dude, when to you get off work?" (then you wait and see what their reaction is...I will not take responsibility for anything that may happen...lol)
2. "Yes, I'll have the lutefisk and goat's cheese special."(that's Norwegian food...blegh!...hey, feel lucky that your parents decided to look into Maui instead of Norway!)
3. "Waiter/Waitress, what is this papaya doing in my soup?"
4. "Excuse me, but my attention was drawn to that VW station wagon, as well as your style of ____(talking, walking, whatever you want to say)...and I thought maybe it was yours... Could I get a picture of you in your car next to me in my red convertible Corvette?"
Excuses for things that happen in Maui:
1. You forgot to bring something from the car or some other responsibility: "Hey, I had a Maui brain fart!"
2. You forgot to help out your sibling for something: "Hey, I had a Maui brain fart!"
3. You were supposed to go to the store and pick something up for your mom/dad and thought you'd get something for yourself as well and got your thing but forgot to get your parent's thing: "Hey, I had a Maui brain fart!"
The fact is, if you need an excuse, it should always be the Maui brain fart one, cuz you can only use it while in Maui!
I will be adding more jokes later. To add a joke, e-mail me at LilDrumerMan5324@AOL.COM Thanks!